We are coming towards the end of the year, so I felt like it was necessary to reflect on 2019 and document my thoughts on how this year has been for me and my plans for 2020.
Family
The year couldn’t have started any worse, I was at work when my mum called me crying to tell me that my grandma had passed anyway. Over the last couple of years I have lost several people close to me, my aunt to cancer, my uncle, murdered in Ghana. But losing my Grandma was the knockout blow. My whole mission was to make things easier for the family and I felt robbed of that. I had booked a flight for my mum to visit her because we knew she was unwell, but the thought of her death never entered my mind. My grandma passed before my mum could visit because instead of me just booking the flight, I was trying to find a decent price and it’s something I will forever regret.
The following weeks made me proud to be Ghanian, I was in total shock of how my mum’s friends supported her. They were simply upholding traditions but it reinforced what friendship should be. We travelled to Ghana for her funeral, it was my first time being back home in 20 years. The send-off was amazing, my aunties and uncles really stepped up, but I also realised that it was now my time to step up.
In 2020 I want to spend a lot more time with the family, I have little cousins and nephews I need to try to see more, and hopefully be a better example for them.
Finances
In 2019 I’ve made more money than I ever have in my career, but I also spent a lot doing “guy guy.” I lost track of mission was and was moving like some “corporate trap star”. As I’m typing this I’m dropping my head in shame. I’ve had everything mapped out from the age of 14, but actually sticking to the plan when it’s in front of you is different. Been focusing in satisfying my short term needs rather than long term goals. Fortunately, I have come to my senses, and I’m being more financially responsible. The goal is to continue investing, but also manage my finances better. Flexing is nothing, changing lives for the people around is the real goal.
In the ideal world I’m trying to manage my finances in the following way:
Invest – 50%
Spend – 20%
Save – 20%
Charity – 10%
I’m not there yet but this is the goal I’m trying to work towards.
Business
Business-wise it has been a disappointing year, working as an independent contractor has made me complacent. I started to neglect the businesses and skills I was working on. I started Lix Boutique with a friend but over the last couple of months I seriously neglected it.
To me, the phrase; ‘you sow what you reap’ is so true, so I am investing more into my businesses, but also into this blog. The dream has always been to build a tech consultancy 2020 we are taking the steps to make this happen.
Health
I’ve spent 8 months of this year being ill due to a lack of discipline. I’m disciplined in certain areas of my life but not across the board. I have a rare condition where I basically can’t eat anything with artificial sugar. But I also have the biggest sweet tooth in the world. This has caused me to suffer from ulcers for the majority of this year. This has affected work and personal life, sometimes people think I’m antisocial when the reality it was painful for me to talk. I’ve made a promise to myself to never let them come back, and I’m committed to that.
I’ve taken training and running more seriously, which has helped with my general well being. I would like to add a hobby to my routine, I’m considering basketball or maybe pick up boxing again. I’m also trying to eat right, working towards being a vegetarian but for now just an extra salad with my meals.
Relationships
If you would have told me in my 20s that I would be 30 and single, I would have told you that you’re lying, but here we are. I made some mistakes, which I have learnt from and I’m just trying my best to move correctly from now on.
The plan is to settle down in 2020, because it’s no longer about being that guy, I have to be a man now. Plus my mum is stressing me for grandkids.
Friends
I started this year trying to make peace with everyone I had a problem with in the past, I’m in a good space, I just can’t be asked to carry that negative energy. But the moment that was done, more problems came my way. Despite everything, I’m blessed to have good people around me which I’m trying to cherish more. I’ve also had some funny people who I’ve started to distance myself from.
Planning to try and just catch up with my people more in 2020, but I think the biggest lesson it to never let someone’s actions change you. I spent many years giving people the same energy they gave me, but I’m done with that.